I have a slight therm problem. See, ordinarily, my house acts as a therm prison, keeping heat in and pushing cold out. This is all due to the efficiency and experience of the therm high court, called the Central Heating System (CHS). In the past, the CHS has cracked down hard on therm crime, preferring to sentence guilty therms to indefinitely long stays in my house until those therms learn to be better, more productive members of therm society by assimilating some basic moral values from, well, me, I guess.
Everything was working out fine. The CHS was sentencing guilty therms by the dozen; those evil therms were learning to be good little therm-itizens; and I was happily toasting away. Then, last Thursday, Lady Pump-ella, newly elected judge to the CHS, decided that the therm-prison–my house–was way overcrowded and could not possibly accommodate any more therms. She proposed instead to institute a sentence of therm community service, thus removing the need for therm prison-space, and leaving me high and cold.
I would just like to say that I think this is a terrible mistake, and to warn all the other people in the world that there are rogue therms out there whose rehabilitation cannot be guaranteed. Therm crime may increase significantly in the short term, and if you, like me, wish to take a stand against the patently unsafe practice of releasing guilty therm-itizens prematurely, then please, please, write to Lady Pump-ella, and register your disenchantment. Therm prison is a necessity of modern therm society–its value cannot be overlooked.
Especially not by me.
Thank you.
